Your Best Isn’t Measured on Your Best Day: Understanding Upper and Lower Bounds
Whether the election has you feeling a bit deflated or totally energized, here’s a little reminder: our 'best' isn’t just how we show up on our brightest, most put-together days. With the busy holiday season and the strong emotional currents stirred up by this time of year, it’s more important than ever to set gentle bounds for ourselves—those steadying limits that keep us grounded and moving forward, no matter what. So let’s explore how defining these personal boundaries can support us through the highs, the lows, and everything in between.
Establishing these bounds allows us to set realistic expectations for ourselves, helping us navigate the demands of the season without added stress. In this post, we’ll explore what upper and lower bounds are, how to identify them in your life, and why they’re essential for a balanced holiday experience.
1. Defining Upper and Lower Bounds
Lower Bound: This is the minimum level of effort or care you can commit to on your busiest or most challenging days. It’s what you can reliably do without stretching yourself too thin.
Upper Bound: This represents the maximum level of effort you can offer when you feel energized and inspired. It’s the point where you can go above and beyond without burning out.
2. Why Setting Bounds Matters
Promotes Self-Compassion: By acknowledging that your best isn’t always the same, you cultivate kindness towards yourself. This helps you recognize that it’s okay to have off days.
Prevents Burnout: Understanding your upper and lower bounds allows you to manage your energy effectively. It helps you avoid overcommitting when you’re feeling good and ensures you’re not too hard on yourself when your energy wanes.
Encourages Flexibility: Life can be unpredictable, especially during the holidays. Setting these bounds provides a framework that adapts to your current state, making it easier to navigate varying demands.
3. Identifying Your Upper and Lower Bounds
Step 1: Reflect on Your Energy Levels
Take some time to think about your typical energy patterns. Ask yourself:
When do you feel most energized?
Are there certain times of day or week when you feel drained?
What activities give you energy, and which ones deplete it?
Step 2: Determine Your Lower Bound
Think about the minimal practices that help you maintain balance during hectic times. For example:
Self-Care Lower Bound: Commit to just five minutes of quiet time, a quick stretch, or even a short walk.
Household Lower Bound: Focus on one essential task each day, like keeping the kitchen clean or ensuring the living room is tidy.
Holiday Lower Bound: Choose one small holiday tradition to maintain, like lighting a candle or sending a quick holiday card to a loved one.
4. Putting Your Bounds into Practice
Daily Check-Ins: At the start of each day, assess your energy levels and adjust your expectations accordingly. If you’re feeling low, stick to your lower bounds. If you wake up with extra energy, see if you can stretch towards your upper bounds.
Create a Visual Aid: Consider making a chart or a simple list of your upper and lower bounds. Keep it visible in your home or on your phone as a reminder of what you can realistically achieve.
Communicate with Others: Share your bounds with family members or close friends. Let them know when you might need support or when you’re feeling up for extra activities. This can help manage expectations and foster understanding.
5. The Importance of Balance
It’s crucial to remember that your best is a dynamic concept. It’s not static; it fluctuates with your circumstances, energy, and mood. On days when you can only manage your lower bound, recognize that you’re still doing your best in that moment. And on those days when you reach for your upper bound, celebrate the extra effort without guilt.
Understanding your upper and lower bounds can transform your experience during the any highly demanding season. Instead of measuring your worth or success based on peak days, you can cultivate a more compassionate approach that honors your current state. This mindset not only helps reduce stress but also allows you to enjoy the season more fully, knowing that your best is not defined by a single day but by your overall journey.